Mama At Last

Today was a rough day. Overwhelming and heavy. Furnishing an apartment, albeit small, is not an easy feat. Well, with a limited budget, it’s not. Buying the majority second hand is exhausting. Emailing back and forth on the condition of the piece in question. Figuring out the transportation options, ensuring that the total budget, that…

It’s a new dawnIt’s a new dayIt’s a new life for me… and I’m feeling good. Mama and son – a new beginning Indeed it is, and indeed I do. I look back at the photos from a mere year ago when my life started anew. It’s a lot of responsibility, immense joy, very little…

Without my son’s biological father or a significant other to be a co-parent to my little boy, there are moments of discouragement when I think of the long term repercussions. As my son gets older, there will be questions on that absence. Questions that I’m still working out how to answer. The bond with grandpa…

Someone recently mocked my social media posts of my life as a new mother, insinuating I’m disingenuous. It has thrown me for a loop and made me step back for a time. Not because anything that was said was factually correct however. I’m far from perfect but integrity is in my backbone and I will…

As a new mother, I am getting more involved in organizations that work to further the causes I am passionate about. This evolves constantly as I become more well read and find experience in subjects related to motherhood. New mama beaming One of those organizations is Haro, Sweden’s leading women’s organization with a focus on…

At a mere two months old, my little precious smiled his way to his first passport. Our first trip abroad was scheduled to visit friends and explore a tulip covered Amsterdam in spring. It wasn’t to be. On April 26th, Scandinavian Airlines pilots decide to go on strike. We were due to leave on the…

The pains of longing will never be forgotten. And I hope that the turmoil I’ve gone through can at some point in life give peace to another. Peace knowing that it can turn. Peace knowing that there is hope. Peace feeling the warmth of empathy from someone who understands. Completely. Peace in the companionship of…

Neither of the two girls manning the childcare at the gym took any notice as I sought their attention with Julian in my arms. I proceeded to lift out a baby walker and put him in it. I left him with a smile, busy exploring all the toys in front of him. I hurried to…

I just checked on Julian who is sleeping. I do this several times a night until I lie down next to him to sleep. I hear him breathing. I stroke his back. I kiss his cheek and let it linger there. I feel as though I’ve won the jackpot and it’s Christmas morning all rolled…

Toys are all around. Pacifiers too. I’m organized yet find pleasure in those traces of a little one that serve as constant reminders that there is a child in my home. I have a family. I savor the past since he’s been in my life and treasure the dawning of each new day. Another milestone…